Lying's the Most Fun a Girl Can Have
by Demonic Angel Clone
Summary: Is it just me," She began as her pink lips formed into a shy smile, "Or do you flatter all of the other girls you meet?" Ino/Suigetsu


**_Lying's the Most Fun a Girl Can Have (And She Should Know, She was Having a Ball)_**

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**Summary: **"Is it just me," She began as her pink lips formed into a shy smile, "Or do you flatter all of the other girls you meet?"

**Pairing:** Ino/Suigetsu

**Genre:** Romance/Humor

**Rating:** M

**Note: **Post Feburary 7th, 2010

**A/N:** Wrote this about a year ago (posted a year exactly), but it went under another story collection under another profile. Enjoy!

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"C'mon Ino? _Please_? Let's take a break before we head home."

The Yamanaka growled in the back of her throat and sent a deathly glare in the direction of her hefty teammate, who was obviously thinking with his stomach and not his head. "No, Chouji," She bit out, then sighed in exasperation, "Look, after that last mission, I just want to go home and crawl into bed."

En route to Konoha, the duo had finished a regulation B Rank mission which consisted of Ino, the seductress who grew close enough to the target to enter his thoughts and erase the memory of her doing so, and Chouji, the muscle. Ino usually had an aversion to missions such as these, but they were part of the job description. Worn out from the strain of a success, they trudged home. Among the sounds of their ninja sandal soles pounding the main road, Chouji's stomach gurgled in protest. As he prodded it mournfully, Ino promptly ignored it. "Ino," He whined in his deep baritone, "Look! There's a restaurant up ahead, why don't we stop there and get something to eat? Please?"

His last plea was spoken with so much desperation that she was restraining the urge to roll her eyes. _Sometimes_, she thought, _Chouji still reverts back to his Genin ways._ "Fine, we might as well stop and get something to eat." She could feel the relief and joy radiating off him as she said the words and shook her head with a shadow of a smile on her face.

As they grew closer to the outside of the establishment, she read the words _**Korean Barbeque**_ on the sign outside. Ino sighed, _figures he would pick that place_. They entered as the heat and fragrance of seared meat washed over them and Chouji quickly sat in a booth, ready to order. Ino, used to this type of behavior from her companion, told him that she was heading to the restroom, to which he nodded his head dumbly as a pretty waitress approached. Ino finally rolled her eyes at his one-track mind; he was almost as bad as Naruto when it came to rolling hips and a sweet smile.

This restaurant, she noted, was far more accepting of paying clientèle than Yakiniku was. There were standard rules one had to follow and even as a shinobi, one couldn't enter Yakiniku with weapons and certainly ones that were in plain sight. Apparently, she surmised as she walked past another booth with a katana on a customer's back, this place encouraged it. She spotted the bathroom near the bar, but before she could head past it, she heard a barking laugh, "Hey, Doll Face, you with the blonde hair."

Ino stopped and looked to her side to see a man with a very large Nodachi strapped to his back and silver hair obscuring his face as he snickered into his drink. She almost wished he kept his gaze there because he gave her a sidelong glance with a sharp grin and even sharper teeth. She wanted to ask who his dentist was so that she could advise him to fire them, immediately. He gave another raspy chuckle, "Hey Doll Face, wanna see a big sword? I'll even let ya sharpen it."

Ino attempted to ignore the several connotations that came to mind from his indirect question, but not even she could ignore the lecherous look over he gave her. Her thumb brushed the side of her thigh, just to make sure she was still clothed. "And why," she began as she crossed her arms, "Would I want to do that?" She asked flippantly as she moved to walk past him. She failed to see him unsheathe his sword, but stopped fast enough to prevent walking into the folded steel. It had a half-circled gap, large enough for her alabaster neck to fit though. She didn't dare move, to prevent the material of her collar to be torn though.

"Take a seat," the laughing lunatic said with a smile in his voice.

Ino narrowed her eyes defiantly, "What if I refuse?"

She didn't see the smirk on his face bloom into a grin, "Then you won't have a mouth to refuse with. Trust me Dolly."

Ino bit back the retort she had, it would be better to have no mouth than a mouth like yours, and kept quiet. She'd just have to play his game for now since he seemed to be the impulsive type. Chouji would just have to wait a bit longer for her to return from the restroom. "Okay, then remove the sword. I can't sit down with a katana to my neck, now can I?"

He chuckled and sheathed his sword lazily as he saw Ino visibly breathe. She sat down next to him and ordered water, to which the man gave her a look of disgust, "_Water_? Who the _fuck_ orders water at a bar?" He whistled at the bartender and ordered her a round of sake and another for himself.

She looked at the collecting glasses on the counter, "So, you drink a lot." She didn't particularly want to start a conversation with this man, but she felt like saying something since it was obvious she wasn't going to leave for a while.

He scoffed as he took another swig, "Fuck, I drink these like water and still can't get a buzz. Sometimes I dream of drowning in a barrel of the junk, just to die with a new experience... although dying would be a new experience in itself, hmm?"

"Funny," she said dryly, "Especially since I wanted to drink some water."

He gave her another side glance and put his shot on the counter, "Like I said, who the fuck drinks water at a bar?"

The bartender returned with two rounds and as Ino went to pay for hers, the man stopped her.

He rolled his eyes, "You're new to this shit, aren't you?" He asked as he put the yen on the bar, "Only an _asshole_ lets the girl pay on a first date."

Ino rose a thin eyebrow, "You call this a _date_?" She inquired as she took her drink and held it in her hands.

He looked at her incredulously, "The fuck did you think it was? I gave you a pick up line, asked you out, and bought you drink. What, are you one of those broads who want a meal too? A holiday to the islands? A house?"

Ino looked down at the alcoholic substance in her cup and shook her head with a smirk on her face. He sure was blunt, but certainly not boring. Let the games begin.

"Well, you didn't tell me your name. How's a girl supposed to give a goodnight kiss to a guy without a name?" She looked over to see that he wasn't the least bit perturbed by this. For all she knew, he probably did this all the time. Maybe she was surprised at herself for being so easy going with a total stranger, a crazed one at that.

He chortled, "Name's Suigetsu. And yours, pretty lady?"

The dimmed area of the bar along with her bangs covered the faint pink blush at his compliment, but she wasn't about to be foolish because of it, "Fuku."

He chuckled, "_Good fortune_, huh? Fits you perfectly, the better for me." He ordered another round, "So, tell me, what village you from?"

Ino narrowed her eyes suspiciously, "Why?"

He drowned other shot and grinned until the ends reached his clouded eyes, "You don't even got a forehead protector on and I know you're a kunoichi."

_So, he's more observant than he looks... not that that's a feat in itself_, she thought. Then she remembered how he said he couldn't get drunk, seemed like he was right. "I'm a missing nin."

He looked closely at her face, deciding whether or not to believe her, then smiled, "No shit? Me too!" He exclaimed with a barking laugh.

"Really?" She said as held her drink, going through all of the names and faces she remembered from the Bingo Book.

"Shit yeah! Being allied to a village is a bunch of bullshit. How long you been on your own?"

"About two or three months." She said before she even thought of the reply. What was wrong with this picture? Was it the fact of him asking too many questions or her not asking enough? When he took another shot of sake, she hastily pulled out her ponytail and shook out the blonde tresses. She could feel his eyes on her and she looked back casually, "What?"

"Damn, Lady Luck," He whispered in soulful tone, "I knew you were pretty, but I didn't know you were _fucking gorgeous_."

Maybe it was the way his eyes roved incredibly over her features, or the absolute profound astonishment in his tone of voice, but Ino couldn't prevent the red haze that crept across her cheeks and even when she looked away, she heard his laugh and knew that he saw her embarrassment. "Is it just me," she began as her pink lips formed into a shy smile, "Or do you flatter all of the other girls you meet?"

He coughed a snarky laugh, "Are you kidding?" He asked, and then smiled a devilish grin, his teeth forming small daggers, "Bitches _love_ me. But you're cool, Lady Luck."

"Really?" Ino asked with a smirk.

"Fuckin' real," He said shortly before taking another drink, "You know," he started, flickering his vision down to her full glass and then to her questioning gaze, "You haven't touched your drink yet. Somethin' wrong with it?"

She looked down at the glass in her hands and gripped it briefly, "I'm not much of a drinker," she said quietly.

"No shit? Really? Wow, must be the first fucking missing nin I've met who doesn't drink. We all have things we gotta forget, y'know."

Ino kept a cool face, but inwardly was worried. Was it that abnormal, to not drink and be a missing nin? She guessed it was and idly wondered how many drinks Sasuke had from becoming a missing nin.

"Hey, Lady Luck, you alright? You're spacing out." Suigetsu asked with concern in his clouded slits.

"Yeah," Ino waved off his question with a gesture of her hand.

Suigetsu breathed out a sigh of exaggerated belief, "Good, you had me thinking you were one of those crazy bitches who go loopy every once in a while. Thank fucking Kami-sama _himself_ that you're not!"

She shoved him playfully after his feigned gratefulness. "Shut up, Suigetsu. I'm guessing you meet a lot of crazy girls then?" She asked and then impulsively took a sip of the sake, enjoying the light tingle on her tongue and the slow burn down her throat. The fumes, though were something she'd have to work on, blinking away the tiny pricks that assaulted her eyes.

He chuckled darkly into his glass before drinking it, "You have no idea, especially red heads. They're royal pains in the ass."

"Ex-girlfriend, right?" She inquired, drinking a longer sip.

"Nah, just some girl who follows our leader around like a ho. The fuck that he has that I don't? Red bug eyes?"

_Red eyes_, Ino thought slowly as she took another swig, _that's peculiar..._"So, you're jealous of him?" She asked and then smirked roguishly, "What type of missing nin has a leader?"

He scoffed, "The type that's bored without a damn thing to do. I mean, he's a fucking bastard, but he has his moments, I guess." He shrugged.

She looked at him closely, drinking in sake as she drank information, "Well, I think she likes him because he's the leader." Ino said knowingly, "After all, most girls go after a leader, rather than a follower. Maybe if you showed her you could lead, she'd go after you too."

Suigetsu rolled his eyes, "So, you like that too?"

Ino contemplated her answer, as she looked down into her almost empty glass, "No. Not anymore." She shook her head, "I mean, I was like that, but not because I really liked the guy, I didn't even know much about him anyways. He was too quiet for me, anyways. Definitely not interesting enough to keep my attention." It almost scared her after a while, how easily the lies came out.

He observed her for a moment, "What about me, am I interestin' enough for you?"

She smiled when she realized she didn't have to lie, "Oh, you top the list of the most interesting people I have ever met, easily."

He snickered in his low raspy voice, "I'd better be, or I'd say you'd met some fucking _weirdos_."

'Fuku' laughed at his joke and finished her drink. She had to admit, talking, or rather, lying, to him was so easy to do. She was actually enjoying it. Ibiki would be proud of her. Her mind lingered on the fact of enjoying that and maybe, just maybe, she enjoyed being someone else, too. She wasn't Yamanaka Ino of the Yamanaka florists, she was Fuku, an ex-kunoichi of a village turned missing nin for about two, or three, months.

So she let him buy her another drink and she laughed at more of his jokes and just when she was beginning to relax, she felt the cold press of a blade at the nape of her neck again, "Do you usually manhandle the girls you hit on?" She glared at him as the tip grew closer.

"Depends," He said noncommittally, "But most of them try lying on the second date, not the first."

She didn't seem surprised by this, "How long did you know?"

"Hm," Suigetsu considered for a moment. "When you said your name."

Her kunai was pressed to his neck before he even noticed and without looking the least bit nervous, he smiled, "Oh, you're one of those bitches that fight _back_. I like that, they usually _bite_ harder." His teeth made a grinding sound for emphasis and he removed the sword from her neck once again.

His laughter tickled her eardrum and she found herself smiling at his attempt to lighten the situation.

She looked over her shoulder and saw Chouji finishing his meal, no doubt his third, or fourth, serving. She looked over at Suigetsu apologetically, "I have to go, can't stay in one place too long, you know."

She moved to get up when his hand wrapped around her bicep, she looked at him with an accusatory stare, "Fine, don't tell me who you are," He looked in her direction with his hair partly obscuring lucid, half-lidded silver eyes, "But you still gotta give me my goodnight's kiss."

She raised a fine eyebrow, "I don't '_gotta'_ give you anything."

He released her arm, smirked, and relaxed his arms behind his head, crossing his hands, "You're right, you don't." As Ino turned to walk away, Suigetsu said behind her with a smile in his voice, "Man, I've _never_ met a missing nin that was a scaredy cat."

Ino stopped in her tracks and turned around, "_What_-" An almost manic stare crossed her features, "-did you say?"

He shrugged indifferently, "You heard me."

Ino blinked and then strode over to him with her hands on her hips, "_Who_ in _Hell_ said that _I_ was _scared_?" She screeched in a higher than normal pitch as her bravado grew. She should've known better, it wasn't as if she didn't know that he was coaxing this response out of her, but she would be damned if anyone called her scared, whether or not they knew who she really was. She flared, he smiled.

"That'd be me, got a problem, _Lucky_?"

She had been pushed over the edge and into his arms, but really, _someone_ had to silence the arrogant bastard. She pushed the -almost comical- image of Ibiki shaking his head in her mind.

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Chouji rubbed his belly contently and looked over at his blonde teammate, who had been uncharacteristically quiet since leaving the restaurant, "Hey, Ino," His brown eyes filling with concern, "Are you alright?"

She shook her head and said her muffled reply behind her hand.

His eyebrow rose, "What was that, I couldn't hear you."

"I said, do you have a band aid?" She mumbled, not fully removing the hand from her mouth.

He looked at her in an even stranger manner, shinobi didn't ask for band-aids! "No," He said slowly, "Why would you need one?"

After a red tint grazed her face, she removed her hand, revealing two very swollen lips and a nasty purple bruise marring her bottom lip. Chouji took a closer look to see _teeth marks_ on the sensitive skin, "I-um," She muttered after her cheeks darkened a bit more, "I _lied_."

Chouji looked at her incredibly, "_So_? How'd you get _those_?"

It seemed as if she had forgotten the cardinal rule: No one lied to a crazy, sadistic bastard.

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I'm considering another part or two, but I'm not sure. Still, reviews are love. :D

DAC


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